The Taxonomy of Shipboard Creatures – Part 4

Timothy Leary Dancers: These strange creatures are rare!  They appear as couples and only at special invitational events where free liquor is dispensed.  As soon as they take to the dance floor, it is evident from their gyrations that they were once flower children of the Haight-Ashbury district.  Alas, their blooms have withered.  Each individual of the couple is attired in matching, tie-dyed apparel; she in a narrow floor length frock and he in some form of Nehru jacket.  Festooned with beads and other symbols appropriate to their lost generation, they require the entire dance floor for their ritual courtship dance because they maintain a minimum distance from each other of 15 feet throughout.  While the female of the couple attempts sinuous, arm-waving motions that are partially disrupted by a senescent tremor, she studiously avoids direct eye contact with her male partner.  He, meanwhile, becomes progressively more flamboyant in his efforts to attract her attention, episodically dropping suddenly into a grotesque, contorted, stationary crouch with his arms outstretched in some ghastly entreaty.  After maintaining this pose for what seems like minutes, and which she continues to ignore, he slowly, carefully, and evidently painfully resumes a more erect posture (albeit slightly less erect than that which he enjoyed prior to displaying his impression of Quasimodo).  Witnessing the mating ritual of the Timothy Leary Dancers (whether or not you tuned-in, dropped out, and turned on) is like having a flashback of a bad trip!  One other feature of note with this rare species is that whenever one passes by their stateroom one is struck (nearly dumb) by a strange, pungent fragrance wafting into the corridor from beneath their door.